On Acting Thoughtlessly

So I've been having this problem lately: I think too much. Which in practical terms is better than the alternative; most of the world's problems could be solved if people considered the long-term costs and benefits of their actions with regard to those around them. But when it comes to spiritual pursuits, thought can be rather stifling. Thought is inherently limited, due to the finite powers of our senses and physical confines of the brain that interprets them. The ultimate spiritual goal, however - call it by whatever name you will - is infinite and eternal, and thus by definition inaccessible to rational thought alone.

Which isn't to say that thought plays no role in contemplating ultimate reality. If that were true, there would be no such thing as science, philosophy, or theology. But as philosopher Alfred Korzybski would say, "the map is not the territory." Anything that can be said of the ultimate reality is only an approximation; from this perspective, no human belief system can be called "true" in its own right, but rather as "pointing" to a truth that can be fully realized only through direct experience. Eastern religions embrace this, hence statements such as "the Tao that can be spoken is not the eternal Tao" (Tao Te Ching, Chapter I) and "As to truth, no truth can be spoken" (Diamond Sutra, Chapter 21), from Taoism and Buddhism respectively.

Which leads back to my problem. I embrace the Eastern perspective on truth, and the eventual need to transcend thought, but at the same time, I find it extremely difficult to silence my mind, especially when contemplating spirituality. I constantly find myself grappling with deep religious / philosophical issues such as the nature of God, the origins of the universe, the Problem of Evil, etc., sometimes to the point of intellectual exhaustion. And what's worse, for all my speculation about the divine, it's been years since I last experienced the divine firsthand.

Which is why, last Wednesday night, I decided to stop thinking. From the time I left my room to get fourth-meal at about 12:30, until I went to bed around 2, I emptied my head of complex thought, and the results were rather intriguing.

Normally it would take me about two minutes to walk to the nearest campus store, but this time it took me about 15 or 20, for in my thoughtless state I took several wide detours to climb trees, jump over fences, and look at lampposts from unusual angles. Every commonplace item had become totally fascinating, and without the distraction of mind I became aware of things I had never before noticed - including some rather large things such as trees and even buildings, which just shows how little attention we pay to our surroundings when caught up in thought.

Once I got to the Commons, however, it became clear that some measure of judgment would be necessary if I was going to get past the security guards and avoid long-term social suicide, so I admitted the bare minimum of reason necessary and went inside. I did enter a couple conversations, though I kept them as short as possible to avoid forays into complex thought. I'm pretty sure people thought I was under some kind of influence, though as fellow college students I doubt if anyone thought less of me for it*. At one point, I found myself debating whether I wanted milk or a bundt cake as my meal plan side, and cut through the trouble by simply buying what was already in my hand: the cake.

*The whole experience was somewhat similar to being drunk, except that while alcohol impairs one's perceptions, deliberate thoughtlessness actually enhances them, and there are no physical symptoms either.

After buying my food, I sat down in one of the lawn chairs outside (despite it being cold and rainy), admired my surroundings as I ate my chips, and impulsively sprinted across the lawn and through some shrubbery to examine Memorial House's facade. On getting back, I microwaved my fettucine alfredo and meditated (meditation being thoughtlessness plus focus). After eating that, I meditated once more, and then went to sleep.

And you know what? I've felt much, much calmer ever since that night. I haven't been disturbed by excessive thought, nor have I felt as anxious as usual.

The whole experience sounds very mundane, of course, and it was. However, I found that when one clears their mind of judgments, priorities, and preconceptions, even a mundane experience can become fascinating. Just as "the map is not the territory," this blog post can't really convey how intriguing and enjoyable the simple experience of climbing trees and buying food can be. So if you want to experience joy and fascination, and take a break from thinking, I recommend clearing your mind now and then and appreciating the world simply as it is. You'll be surprised at how much you've been missing out on.